I had a friend stop by for a visit yesterday and during the course of this pandemic she has exposed herself to many media sources and has developed some new opinions, many I don’t agree with but it is not my place to judge her or her information.
What I did realize, from the information that she is watching, she is in a real fear-based state. Afraid of how the world is going to look, afraid of the stock market crash, afraid of the protests in the streets destroying everything, afraid that all the finger-pointing is going to destroy people, afraid that if she is asked to wear a mask it is the beginning of her civil liberties being taken away, afraid that it will start with a mask and before you know it she will have a mandatory vaccine injected into her arm. Surprisingly not incredibly afraid of Covid 19 but cautiously aware. Within all of this fear, she is paralyzed, unable to find any solutions.
I listened, which for me honestly is a newer skill. I just listened. I didn’t respond, react, or dispute, not because I agreed with her but because she kept using the word truth. “It’s the truth, you know.” “The truth is….”. “I’ve done my research and the truth is…” Who am I to say that it is not her truth? When she was finished I spoke some of my truth, she couldn’t hear it, and honestly, that is okay. I haven’t unfriended her. There is much about our relationship that is full of love, light, and laughter, there is joy found in the conversations that we have together. She just can’t hear me and that is ok. I can hear her but I don’t agree. There is a difference and I realized it yesterday fully. I have not been put on this planet to change anyone’s mind. I have been put on this planet to live my life, share my individual gifts and to find a way to serve everyday. Changing her is not my business. Changing me is not her business.
That seems hard to swallow and accept in this time of anger and shutting those out who disagree with us. There is so much anger and so much finger-pointing on that the two of us can agree. My hope is that we can keep our hearts open to listening so that in the end we can at least hear each other, we don’t need to agree, but can we listen.
I did feel for her heart because she is living in such fear so I did write out this note for her this morning..
I listened as you spoke about all of your fears and how you are scared. I honour that you are scared, but I, I am hopeful. I am hopeful because never in a time of our recent history has so much darkness been brought out of the shadows. The awareness of horrendous human trafficking is being known by the masses, systems of racism are at least being seen, if not yet changed. Many people who were seen as “good” are being exposed for some horrible behaviour. People are getting out and spending time with their families in ways that haven’t happened in years, people are becoming still. Don’t get me wrong there is still so much to be done, but I am hopeful that light is being spread over the darkness. People are walking away from some organized religions and finding their own path to God and Spirituality. Instead of following the dogma of exclusion and hatred, they are looking to the direct teachings of Jesus, Buddha, and Mohammed. If we are at the “End of Days” as you say, I would rather live my life hopeful and in the light, because to live our lives in fear and pain seems like just a waste.
In love, light and laughter